Friday, September 03, 2004
The Three Things That Made The Biggest Impression On Me Last Night
1) Yesterday after work, I went out for drinks with some co-workers. I wasn’t totally looking forward to it, but I had made a commitment and I was determined to stick with it. In any case, I really had a great time. I just love the security guard at my job. He is the sweetest, toughest, nicest guy and he always takes such good care of me. Being able to spend time with him outside of work was a pure joy. I’ve decided that I want to have him and his wife over for dinner. They are definitely a couple I want to share an experience like that with.
2) After happy hour, I went with my friend Angie to a surprise birthday party. Very rarely do I get to go to events like this. We all showed up at the bar at 9pm and waited for the moment when our friend Olivia would walk through the door. When she entered, Angie blew her birthday horn so loud and crazily that I almost pissed all over the floor. It immediately became the funniest thing ever and I told her to bring the horn home so we could blow it whenever we want. I was amazed at how friendly everyone at the party was. I talked politics, I talked coming out stories, I talked sex. It was random and fun and a bit chaotic at points. During one of my many cigarette breaks, these two girls asked me if I would escort them over to a homeless man that seemed to have died on the street. As a rule, I don’t like to get involved with the homeless, but in last night’s situation, how was I going to say no? After picking up the homeless guy off the ground we asked him if he needed anything. “A beer! I need a fucking beer! I can’t go to sleep without a beer!” We apologized for being unable to fulfill his request and went back to the bar. About ten minutes later, I looked out the window and saw some dude messing with the homeless man. The poor homeless guy sat there defensively as the other fucker yelled at him and laughed. I immediately left the bar and walked over to see what the problem was. Turns out, the random guy was fucking wasted and was just looking for trouble. I handed the homeless guy $4 and told him to either buy a beer or something to eat. His smile lit up his face. He got up and walked to the nearest convenience store. Usually I avoid homeless people, but when you actually do make a connection with one, their humanity breaks all preconceived notions.
3) Paul called me around 11pm and told me that he was home from work. I immediately jumped into a cab and went to his apartment. He had subs and hummus waiting for me. It was a nice surprise for my starving drunk ass. We watched Bully and loved every second of it. Truth be known, I’ve seen the movie about a quadrillion times and since I was drunk, I was screaming every line at the top of my lungs. It was super fun. And super annoying for a sober Paul, but he took it with stride. At around 2am, Paul and I got into bed and curled up happy and content.
The one thing that I have left out is the “deal” I made with the security guard. You see, the new superintendent in my building is wicked hot. I’m talking built. He speaks very little English and from what I hear, he has a wife and two kids. This hot ass can’t be more than 26 years old, but damn, I just love him. Anyway, I asked the security guard if he would find a way to get the superintendent to take his shirt off. In return, I told him that I would get Angie to take her shirt off for him. Hahaha. Luckily Angie approved this deal and we are well on our way to seeing the superintendent half naked with rippling abs and pecs. Just now, the guard called me to let me know that the super showed up in a muscle shirt (see: t-shirt with no sleeves). I ran downstairs to smoke a cigarette and watch his biceps twitch and bulge. So far, the BEST part of my entire day.
Here is the moral of the story: If you really want something, make sure your friends have nice tits and are willing to show them.
OMG. The guard just came up and gave me the present of my life! He asked the superintendent to put on a tank top and take a picture. For SOME reason the super obliged and I am now the proud owner of two VERY hot pictures! Man! You should SEE his body! As though Angie has telepathy, she just called me on the phone and I explained what happened. She burst out laughing and we have scheduled a photo shoot for Sunday. She will have to pose in some of her nicest lingerie. HAHAHA. Hey, a deal is a deal. I’m so lucky to have hot friends who don’t mind exploiting themselves for my benefit.
Man, today has started out to be SUPER erotic.
Have great weekends all!
1) Yesterday after work, I went out for drinks with some co-workers. I wasn’t totally looking forward to it, but I had made a commitment and I was determined to stick with it. In any case, I really had a great time. I just love the security guard at my job. He is the sweetest, toughest, nicest guy and he always takes such good care of me. Being able to spend time with him outside of work was a pure joy. I’ve decided that I want to have him and his wife over for dinner. They are definitely a couple I want to share an experience like that with.
2) After happy hour, I went with my friend Angie to a surprise birthday party. Very rarely do I get to go to events like this. We all showed up at the bar at 9pm and waited for the moment when our friend Olivia would walk through the door. When she entered, Angie blew her birthday horn so loud and crazily that I almost pissed all over the floor. It immediately became the funniest thing ever and I told her to bring the horn home so we could blow it whenever we want. I was amazed at how friendly everyone at the party was. I talked politics, I talked coming out stories, I talked sex. It was random and fun and a bit chaotic at points. During one of my many cigarette breaks, these two girls asked me if I would escort them over to a homeless man that seemed to have died on the street. As a rule, I don’t like to get involved with the homeless, but in last night’s situation, how was I going to say no? After picking up the homeless guy off the ground we asked him if he needed anything. “A beer! I need a fucking beer! I can’t go to sleep without a beer!” We apologized for being unable to fulfill his request and went back to the bar. About ten minutes later, I looked out the window and saw some dude messing with the homeless man. The poor homeless guy sat there defensively as the other fucker yelled at him and laughed. I immediately left the bar and walked over to see what the problem was. Turns out, the random guy was fucking wasted and was just looking for trouble. I handed the homeless guy $4 and told him to either buy a beer or something to eat. His smile lit up his face. He got up and walked to the nearest convenience store. Usually I avoid homeless people, but when you actually do make a connection with one, their humanity breaks all preconceived notions.
3) Paul called me around 11pm and told me that he was home from work. I immediately jumped into a cab and went to his apartment. He had subs and hummus waiting for me. It was a nice surprise for my starving drunk ass. We watched Bully and loved every second of it. Truth be known, I’ve seen the movie about a quadrillion times and since I was drunk, I was screaming every line at the top of my lungs. It was super fun. And super annoying for a sober Paul, but he took it with stride. At around 2am, Paul and I got into bed and curled up happy and content.
The one thing that I have left out is the “deal” I made with the security guard. You see, the new superintendent in my building is wicked hot. I’m talking built. He speaks very little English and from what I hear, he has a wife and two kids. This hot ass can’t be more than 26 years old, but damn, I just love him. Anyway, I asked the security guard if he would find a way to get the superintendent to take his shirt off. In return, I told him that I would get Angie to take her shirt off for him. Hahaha. Luckily Angie approved this deal and we are well on our way to seeing the superintendent half naked with rippling abs and pecs. Just now, the guard called me to let me know that the super showed up in a muscle shirt (see: t-shirt with no sleeves). I ran downstairs to smoke a cigarette and watch his biceps twitch and bulge. So far, the BEST part of my entire day.
Here is the moral of the story: If you really want something, make sure your friends have nice tits and are willing to show them.
OMG. The guard just came up and gave me the present of my life! He asked the superintendent to put on a tank top and take a picture. For SOME reason the super obliged and I am now the proud owner of two VERY hot pictures! Man! You should SEE his body! As though Angie has telepathy, she just called me on the phone and I explained what happened. She burst out laughing and we have scheduled a photo shoot for Sunday. She will have to pose in some of her nicest lingerie. HAHAHA. Hey, a deal is a deal. I’m so lucky to have hot friends who don’t mind exploiting themselves for my benefit.
Man, today has started out to be SUPER erotic.
Have great weekends all!
